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2004

Memorial for Mikey Butler at YU (2004)

Eulogies & Memorials

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Eulogy for Gabriel Levine (1996)

I am here to speak this eulogy not only because of the relationship with YU/RIETS, but as a friend of more than 20 years. GL was brilliant – in business and communal leadership. To the very end he was concerned for the community; he bought a parcel just days before his stroke. His high intelligence was not surprising – a brainy Litvak! But equally, he had a לב טוב – he loved the Jewish people and Torah. The Levites carried the Mishkan – oh, how many משכנות he carried... But he especially loved RIETS (and YU) – for two reasons: his older brother was a מוסמך, and he believed in RIETS, saw its products. GL was a family man – all the years I knew him, he was devoted to his wife, children, and grandchildren (Linda), and to his wife’s family. It is especially fortuitous and right that – Blanche. She and her illustrious family are YU through and through... But: a much larger family than he thought. כל המלמד בן חברו תורה כאילו ילדו. Haftarah (Isaiah 49): Zion says God has forsaken me, forgotten me... שאי סביב עיניך וראי – all RIETS graduates are his children and grandchildren – and all this day mourn – כולן נקבצו באו לך. For RIETS/YU – a terrible loss. He was special to us. Ten years ago, at the Centennial חג הסמיכה, his citation read: "Our tradition tells us that the voice of the archangel Gabriel can be heard around the world. Your voice can be heard often and proudly in keeping our heritage alive. You have been a guardian angel, watching over YU – for you know we guard our future by supporting the teaching of our young people." GL's צדקה was phenomenal – he always wanted to be a giver, not a taker. He was less interested in receiving honors than in contributing meaningfully to RIETS. When told we needed him to accept an honor – he reluctantly consented, but "only after I deliver." Therefore, we note with special sadness: he agreed with us to celebrate the academic year 1996–97 at Convocation as the first recipient of the רי״א ספקטור Medallion – the single most importan…
Eulogies & Memorials

Outline

Eulogy for Joshua Bender (1998)

I am humbled by the task of delivering a eulogy over a תלמיד wrenched from us before the prime of life. How does one speak about an unmitigated tragedy that is literally unspeakable? There is so much to say, yet so little that our limited language lets us say. Most lives end with a period: reasonable length, some contribution. Others – exclamation points! – quick fame or notoriety. A fortunate few are paragraphs: full, long, contented, creative. But some? And we can only stare wordlessly into the gaping mystery of it all – why did it happen? Why Josh? Why now? Why so young? And it is compounded by the ultimate existential mystery of life and death: what is its meaning? What is the role of man in the world? So we wonder in amazement that so young a life was snuffed out, leaving behind bereaved parents, a grieving brother – and questions, many questions. More questions.במדבר: "מבן עשרים שנה ומעלה כל יוצא צבא בישראל תפקדואותם" (מלחמה). מפרשים: מכאן—"בו עשרים לרדוף ". רמב״ן: משה מנאן ולא חסר, דוד מנאן וחסר. הסיבה: משה התחיל בבן כ', דוד בבן י״ג.Reason: 13=man, majority. But not yet ready לרדוף, pursuit of ambit’n/career/struggl f primacy/do battle w rivals. This can be good/postv—BUT can-> vicious’ss, callous’ss, insenstvy othrs. Can enhance civiliz’n—or cast us into jungle. קנאת סופרים תרבה חכמה or rat-race. לרדוף brings out in us best-& worst.JOSH—just 19—left us as man, mature beynd yrs—on brink of career, לרדוף but not yet test self. So, will always remain way was: honr stdt, nvr arrognt/modest, nt overbearg/senstv, not callous/בעל מידות not hardened by If s combatv’ss. חסד: volnteer ambulnc Fairlawn; At Yeshiva University—liked by SSSB classmates & tchers. Good person—quiet/pleasnt. That’s hw we’ll remmbr him: deent, gentle,frndly...To his schoolmates at Yeshiva U., perplxd/puzzld/deeply perturbd: What can do to show grief/respet? DOV SAD AN STORY...SO: detrmn each us contribt to fillg out the years denied t him—by learng morc.dccpr Tor; try give greatr…
Eulogies & Memorials

Speech

Mikey Butler: A Eulogy by R. Lamm (2004)

What an amazing young man Mikey was! A truly unique individual, one of our most outstanding students, present and former, his life deserves to become a legend at Y.U. He was a handsome, fair-skinned and fair-haired young fellow, engaging and polite, with a winning and almost ubiquitous smile, a man of innate dignity who carried life lightly yet seriously. Despite terrible disabilities, he communicated with friends and teachers far and near – indeed, the whole world – through his computer. Mikey loved people. He was an אוהב את הבריות ומעורב עם הבריות, and a true and loyal ירא שמים. It seemed that he was subject to a strange see-saw relationship: the more his body was afflicted – eyes and ears failing to function, constant and debilitating air-pain, lungs diseased, heart threatened – the higher the level of רוחניות that he attained; the more the disease battered his physical self, the more gracious and refined and dominant and pure his spiritual self became, and the more his נשמה shone with a special luminescence. He reminded me of the Torah’s description of Egypt’s failed policy of persecution: "וכאשר יענו אותו כן ירבה וכן יפרוץ – ובני ישראל". Mikey was blessed with extraordinary parents. Nina and Dan Butler too suffered without complaining. They taught him to cherish living every day – ב"ה יום יום – to take full advantage of his clear mind and sharp intellect, his big heart and his fabulous charm – one might almost say charisma. They taught him – and he taught them – the meaning of ייסורים של אהבה: not only to accept suffering with love, but suffering because one whom you love is in pain. The Talmud (Yoma 35b) records a fascinating passage about excuses for not learning Torah: ת"ר עני ועשיר ורשע באין לדין. לעני אומרים לו: מפני מה לא עסקת בתורה? אם אומר: עני הייתי וטרוד במזונותי – אומרים לו: כלום עני היית יותר מהלל?... עשיר, אומרים לו: מפני מה לא עסקת בתורה? אם אומר: עשיר הייתי וטרוד הייתי בנכסי – אומרים לו: כלום עשיר היית יותר מרבי אלעזר?... רשע, אומרים לו: מפני מה…
Yeshiva University Eulogies & Memorials