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August 4, 1996

Eulogy for Gabriel Levine (1996)

Eulogies & Memorials
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Eulogy for Henry Lindenbaum (1982)

I rise to speak the eulogy over Henry Lindenbaum out of pain, of course, and out of love and sympathy – but mostly out of numbness. We read from the Torah that when Aaron, brother of Moses, lost his two children, va-yidom Aharon. The accepted translation is that Aaron was silent. Silence, indeed, is the most sensible reaction to the enormity of the disaster that has overtaken this family and our community. What can one say about this terrible coincidence, this repetition of an unspeakable tragedy: his father was killed in a crash at the age of 47, and now Henry is killed in a crash at age 45, leaving a wife in the prime of her youth; mothers and brothers and a sister to relive the pain of the old wound even as the new one sinks its teeth into them; and children bereft of a father whom they idolized.But there is a second translation of that Scriptural term va-yidom (attributed to the Jerusalem Targum) and that is, ve'shabbach, "and Aaron praised." The plain meaning of that commentary is that Aaron, despite his grief, praised God. But why not interpret that to mean, as well, that he praised his deceased children?We are here to say farewell to Henry and to bemoan him but also to give him the praise he 80 richly deserved.Perhaps the most salient feature of his short life was his capacity for growth. Orphaned of a wonderful father when veryyoung, angry and resentful at his harsh fate, a rebellious child — he grew and matured to a pleasant, warm, gracious, tranquil, loving, and loveable adult.He gallantly overcame his childish pique to become a splendid human being -- and, as well, a highly successful businessman.In his business dealings and in all his relationships he was impeccably honest. He conducted himself with unsullied honor and uncompromised integrity. He was fair, straight, ethical -- a true gentleman.Henry never spoke an evil word about another person, and no person ever had anything bad to say about him. His character was never touched by envy. No matter wha…
Eulogies & Memorials

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Eulogy for Joshua Bender (1998)

I am humbled by the task of delivering a eulogy over a תלמיד wrenched from us before the prime of life. How does one speak about an unmitigated tragedy that is literally unspeakable? There is so much to say, yet so little that our limited language lets us say. Most lives end with a period: reasonable length, some contribution. Others – exclamation points! – quick fame or notoriety. A fortunate few are paragraphs: full, long, contented, creative. But some? And we can only stare wordlessly into the gaping mystery of it all – why did it happen? Why Josh? Why now? Why so young? And it is compounded by the ultimate existential mystery of life and death: what is its meaning? What is the role of man in the world? So we wonder in amazement that so young a life was snuffed out, leaving behind bereaved parents, a grieving brother – and questions, many questions. More questions.במדבר: "מבן עשרים שנה ומעלה כל יוצא צבא בישראל תפקדואותם" (מלחמה). מפרשים: מכאן—"בו עשרים לרדוף ". רמב״ן: משה מנאן ולא חסר, דוד מנאן וחסר. הסיבה: משה התחיל בבן כ', דוד בבן י״ג.Reason: 13=man, majority. But not yet ready לרדוף, pursuit of ambit’n/career/struggl f primacy/do battle w rivals. This can be good/postv—BUT can-> vicious’ss, callous’ss, insenstvy othrs. Can enhance civiliz’n—or cast us into jungle. קנאת סופרים תרבה חכמה or rat-race. לרדוף brings out in us best-& worst.JOSH—just 19—left us as man, mature beynd yrs—on brink of career, לרדוף but not yet test self. So, will always remain way was: honr stdt, nvr arrognt/modest, nt overbearg/senstv, not callous/בעל מידות not hardened by If s combatv’ss. חסד: volnteer ambulnc Fairlawn; At Yeshiva University—liked by SSSB classmates & tchers. Good person—quiet/pleasnt. That’s hw we’ll remmbr him: deent, gentle,frndly...To his schoolmates at Yeshiva U., perplxd/puzzld/deeply perturbd: What can do to show grief/respet? DOV SAD AN STORY...SO: detrmn each us contribt to fillg out the years denied t him—by learng morc.dccpr Tor; try give greatr…
Eulogies & Memorials

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Eulogy for Murray Baumel (2001)

My first memory Uncle M – 2 1/2 years old, with brother Moishe. Last Thursday, brother and I flew to Florida for last visit with him. All through his life, Goodness – to our mind – main feature his personality. I loved the man... I flattered that he reciprocated. But then again – all of us felt that way about him. Madelaine – his life-partner: equal טובת לב; accessible to family. נחת from daughters... Howie... grandchildren – His inner life... not always evident to outsiders... M grew up in special home – father Rav/Gaon... not easy for sons. BUT M adored him, loved him, doted on him – Indeed: M saw in his eminent father his profound link to past/tradition/Yiddishkeit. שמות רבה – בשעה שעלה הקב״ה למשה טירון היה משה לנבואה. אמר הקב״ה: אם עלה אני עליו בקול גדול – אני מבעתו; בקול קטון – בוסר על הנבואה. אמר הקב״ה: מה אעשה? עלה עליו בקול של אביו עמרם. אמר משה: אבא חיי מה אבא מבקש? אמר לו הקב״ה: איני אביך אלא אלהי אביך, בפתוי באתי אליך שלא תתירא: אנכי אלהי אביך, אלהי אברהם אלהי יצחק ואלהי יעקב. שמח משה ואמר: הרי אבא נמנה עם האבות, ולא עוד אלא שהוא גדול והוא מכר תחלה. M always felt inadequate compared father... felt he disappointed him. Expressed to me directly... people = different / conditions different USA / Poland (but these did not remain negative feelings. Instead – loved him more. As grew older, even tried to participate in Zeid's intellectual life – Gave דברי תורה... Active in shul/community; was מוקיר רבנן. What a tribute to him – to grow morally/spiritually in your 80s–90s... He and Madelaine endowed annual Faculty Incentive Award YU... and named it Moishe–Murray, Baumol–Baumel and Madelaine B. On behalf all nephews/nieces: we loved you, M, will always remember you.
Eulogies & Memorials