Dear Max: I received your sad letter here in Lake Como, Pa., and I am dictating a response which my secretary is typing up and sending to you together with the enclosed letter which I am returning herewith. Your letter, quite frankly, made very painful reading. It looks like a classic example of "hillul ha-shem.” Anything that diminishes Orthodox Judaism, diminishes each of us at the same time. However, quite honestly, I would be most reluctant to attempt either to justify the young man or the daughter of this [redacted]. My own experience in counselling married couples has taught me that there are almost always two sides to every story, and that even when you are aware of both it is exceedingly difficult to assign major blame to one side or the other. Your [redacted] quite understandably blames his son-in-law, and justifies his daughter. Perhaps if you heard the other party speaking, you would get the reverse impression. There is, frankly, very little that you can do to dissuade [redacted] from his generalization that because his son-in-law is Orthodox, and his son-in-law is indecent (according to his interpretation), therefore all Orthodox Jews and Orthodox Judaism is wrong.What should you do? I would suggest writing to him and telling him the following: first, that you are deeply grieved to hear of the unfortunate situation that developed, and that you hope all will go well. Second, tell him that it was his misfortune to have gotten involved with an Orthodox Jew who is the exception rather than the rule. Inform him of your own wide experience, and of the fact that you have rarely come across such a case among commited, Jews, but that no group, nor individual is perfect. I would plead with him not to judge all Orthodox Jews on the basis of the misconduct of one such person, even as we rightly appeal to the non-Jewish world not to judge all Jews because of the misdeeds of one or several Jews.Finally, as to the practical question, I would strongly suggest that he s…