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Correspondence

June 13, 1967

Letter to Riverside Memorial Chapel Praising its Cooperation with Ladies Chevra Kadisha (1967)

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Correspondence

Letter to Members of the Chevra Kadisha with Praise and Stressing Need for Confidentiality (1969)

To: All Members of the Hebra Kadisha, Men’s and Women’s Divisions, From: Rabbi Norman Lamm: I want to take this opportunity to offer some words of special commendation to all members of the Hebra Kadisha for having carried out with such dedication and efficiency the very demanding tasks that unfortunately were imposed upon them several times in the last few weeks. It is a tribute to the members of the Hebra, and a vindication of the esteem and affection in which they are held by our entire congregation, that despite especially trying circumstances, their voluntary work continued unabated and without reluctance.As an addendum to this thank-you note, in which I know all The Center joins me, I want to record some observations which may be of importance for future activity of the Hebra.It sometimes happens that post-mortems are performed on the bodies of those to whom the Hebra ministers. When this happens, please bear in mind that if the autopsy was performed against the decision of the Rabbis, or without obtaining their prior permission, then the Rabbis will usually (but not always) refrain from asking the Hebra to offer their services in that case. Whenever, therefore, you do find such a condition, you may assume that rabbinical consent was given, either because civil law demanded it, or because the Halakhah required it or permitted it.In all such cases, please bear in mind that special delicacy and tenderness should be extended not only to the deceased, but also to the sentiments of the survivors. The less that is said to outsiders about such individual cases the better. The Hebra ought to treat all such information as confidential and privileged, in the same way that a lawyer does not disclose the affairs of his client, or a Rabbi the problems of those who come to consult him. Otherwise, a great deal of the good that all of us try to do, and in fact do, is impaired.I hope you will forgive this lengthy note, but I do think that the members of the Hebra ought to kno…
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Correspondence

Letter to Mrs. Kaplan about Effort to Recruit Women for Chevra Kadisha (1974)

Dear Lilly, I am writing to you about a rather delicate matter. It is so delicate that I must ask you in advance not to refuse me until you have thought about the issue carefully, and given me an opportunity to discuss it with you. One of the most significant features of a truly Jewish community is that it does not relegate the care of the deceased to some impersonal agency, but assigns such service to the most distinguished members of its community, who are expected to do it with tenderness and sympathy. That is why the Hebra Kadisha has always been an Honor Society in the Jewish communities, and its presence or absence is often the best criterion of how authentically Jewish a community or synagogue is.At The Center, we are proud that some of our very finest people have been elected to membership in the Hebra Kadisha, and have accepted graciously and have performed their work loyally.While we presently have enough members in our Men's Hebra Kadisha, that is not true for our Ladies group. It is for this reason that I am turning to you, and several other young women of our congregation, and asking you to meet with Rabbi Jung and me briefly in order to discuss the matter with us.In order to make it possible for those of you who work to be able to participate, I am calling it for Sunday morning, March 3, at 10:00 A.M. It will be a brief meeting, since I must begin my Jewish philosophy class at 11:00 A.M.It is quite possible that your first reaction will be negative; that is not unusual, and we have had the same experience with previous members of the Ladies group, as well as with the men.However, I implore you not to act on that basis, but to suspend your decision until you join us in exploring the situation on the date mentioned above.Please do be kind enough to notify my office that we may expect you.Cordially,RABBI NORMAN LAMMNL\:cw
Death & Mourning

Correspondence

Letter to Dr. Offenbacher about the Chevra Kadisha and Burial Procedures (1974)

Dear Elmer, Just a note or two about the Hebra Kadisha: (1) Rabbi Wermuth told me that Mr. Dorfzaun and you had raised some questions about the coffins that we permit for burials which take place under the aegis of The Jewish Center. I would like to inform you that we do not insist upon the very cheapest pine box. As long as there are no halakhic violations, we like to give the family some area of choice. The Riverside people therefore know that there are three boxes of which we approve.In the next few weeks, I will be making up the schedule for the three lectures that had been requested by the Hebra Kadisha. At the suggestion of some of the members, these will be kept restricted only to members of the Hebra. My present plans call for one lecture on , one on (these two to be given to the men's and women's Hebra Kadisha together), and one, to each group separately, on the practical techniques. The last lecture should be more in the form of a seminar by the older members to the newer ones. If there are any questions, they should be submitted to me in advance by the individuals who will be leading the discussion.I would like the Hebra Kadisha to consider the following idea, which I propose tentatively. At present, our tasks seem to be exclusively related to taharah. As you yourself had indicated, we ought to broaden the scope of our activities. My thought is that if that is the case, we ought to enlarge the Hebra and invite participation even by those who may be too squeamish to participate in a taharah. We might, for instance, set the number of 18 members for each group, knowing that there are at least half of each group that we can count on for taharot. The others could be assigned specific duties, such as telephoning. But much more important would be the following two areas: men members of the Hebra, especially those who do not volunteer for taharot, would be expected to attend minyanim of families sitting shiva, so that there never be any problem of a family of Th…
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