Letter from Florence Asch about Shiva Call (2003)

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Eulogy for Marsha Stern (1979)

I rise to speak the eulogy over Marsha this morning, despite great reluctance, because she requested it of me often, very often, directly and indirectly, over a long period of time; and halakhic authority has informed me that mitzvah le 'kayyem divrei ha-met, it is a sacred obligation to fulfill the wishes of the dying. So I speak, despite my hesitation and discomfort and scruples, because it is a mitzvah — and because I loved my friend Marsha dearly.I first met Marsha while co-chairing with her a Yeshiva University Women's Organization function about seven years ago. It was a spiritual and psychological discovery getting to know this attractive, efficient, outspoken, demanding, open-hearted, and extremely generous young woman. From then on we became fast friends, and the friendship increased with every week.What kind of person was Marsha? It is hard to describe her in a single set of adjectives — she was much too human, too complex, and too special for that. Perhaps her personality can best be expressed in the paradox that Carl Sandburg used to describe Abraham Lincoln — she was "made of steel and velvet."The steel was her indomitable will, her incredible bravery, her powerful character. She leaves behind her a legacy of strength and moral courage. At no point, no matter what the provocation, did she succumb to self-pity or to panic. She stared the Angel of Death in the face, and wrested from him his most precious secret: how to live. Marsha maintained that this five-year period of illness and agony was actually the most creative part of her life. She discovered her own identity and learned to be happy with it. Or perhaps it is inaccurate to say that she "discovered" her identity; more correctly, she created it, she forged an identity in the very furnace of affliction.Beset by problems and suggestions of despair that would normally have crushed any ordinary person, she fought back and mastered them. Every rock and every boulder in her path she considered stepping-…

Eulogies & Memorials

Eulogy for Mrs. Florence Feinberg (1967)

Florence Feinberg was a woman of rare strength. That was probably her most notable characteristic. Throughout her life she manifested an unusual moral heroism that evoked a passionate loyalty from her husband and the profound admiration of her family and friends. She was gifted with an astonishing fortitude of character: she attained vision when others merely possessed sight. She learned how to listen, with an inner ear, to the heart-beat of others, while others never progressed beyond mere hearing. Although beset, for so many years, by physical illness, she emerged with attitudes that were remarkably healthy. Optimistic, cheerful, and never complaining, she overcame her shortcomings by a display of power of spirit. It is this that prevented her from ever succumbing to bitterness and moroseness and that helped her on to achieve a disposition that was sweet, gentle, and noble. It took brave stamina for her to attend the Center’s Tuesday Bible classes regularly, no matter what the circumstances. I shall miss her sorely; it will never be the same without her at my right hand.It is altogether appropriate, therefore, that in tribute to this lady of strength of character and courage of spirit, we now recite selected verses from that immortal passage from King Solomon’s Proverbs beginning with the words eshet hayil. ;.'his is an idiom which we normally translate as ”a woman of valor.” But in fact hayil means ”Strength” — and the valor of our eshet hayil, Florence Feinberg, lay in her hayil, her moral might and bravery.A woman of valor who can find?For her worth 18 far above rubles.The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her. And he hath no lack of happiness.She doeth him good and not evil. All the days of her life.She stretcheth out her hand to the poor;Yea, she reacheth forth her hand to the needy.Her husband 18 known in the gates, When he sitteth among the elders of the land. Strength and dignity are her clothing, And she laugheth at the time to come. She openeth …

Eulogies & Memorials