Exchange about Providing Therapy for Young Gay Man (1976)

1. Correspondent 38 to R. Lamm (Oct. 29, 1976)

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Oct. 29, 1976

Dear Rabbi Lamm: עמו"ש

After reading your article in the 1974 Encyclopedia Judaica Yearbook on "Judaism and the Modern Attitude to Homosexuality," I feel that you could possibly help me in recommending some behavioral therapists or any other professionals in the New York area.

I know of a 21 year old Orthodox boy who is seeking help, and would like to see him get the right counselling.

I would greatly appreciate your giving this your prompt attention, and hope to hear from you at your earliest convenience.

Anonymity is requested by the young man.

Sincerely yours,

"לה' הישועה על עמך ברכתך סלה"

תהילים ג'ט'

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Exchange about Gay Jewish Student Group (1973)

Dear Norman, Since I saw you a year and a half ago at the Starlight, or Morasha to be more exact, I found that being a Hillel Director is a very enriching experience with much satisfaction. Berkeley is a unique campus with many novel and peculiar situations. There is a group in and around Berkeley that calls itself "Achvah." It is a group of gay Jewish men. They are in search of legitimacy and acceptance within the Jewish community and particularly within the Jewish student community here at Hillel. I have an impression that you have written on the subject. If you have, I need all manner of information about how to deal with this group, or whether to deal with them at all.Cordially yours,[redacted]

Marriage & Sexuality

Exchange about Meeting a Couple Before Their Wedding (1973)

Dear Rabbi Lamm, I have beautiful news that I would like to share with you. Last March, I was fortunate to meet a young man by the name of [redacted]. Right at the beginning, I knew that he was someone special. As we conversed, I had the feeling that we were continuing a conversation that had been started previously. [redacted] is from Cromwell, Connecticut (a small town near Hartford), and we were able to see each other regularly. The relationship developed and deepened, and now we are engaged. We plan to marry at the end of June.[redacted] is Magna Cum Lauda graduate of the University of Connecticut (Phi Beta Kappa, too!). He is in his third year at University of Connecticut School of Medicine.I'm still teaching at Somers High School in Connecticut, and I'm working towards my master's degree at Trinity College, Hartford.[redacted] and I will stay in the area for his final year of medical school. He doesn't yet know where he will be interning.Rabbi Lamm, I am blessed that [redacted] will be my companion through life. He is a beautiful person.We have made an appointment with Rabbi Weisfogel of Kodinah, and we will be meeting with him shortly.[redacted] and I would also like to meet with you before the wedding. Would it be possible to make arrangements to meet with you at the Center? I do realize how hectic your schedule is, but I cannot envision my marriage without your approval.Sincerely,[redacted]

Marriage & Sexuality

Exchange with R. Pincus about Homosexuality as a Criminal Offense (1969)

Dear Rabbi Lamm, I read with stark disbelief your statement in today’s N.Y. Times, p. 49, that “homosexuality between consenting adults should not be treated as a criminal offense.” Surely, you couldn’t mean that homosexuality is not a criminal offense to התורה for when we have פסוקים in the Torah that prohibit משכב זכור and is punishable by death. If you referred to דינא דמלכותא, you also overlooked a רמב"ם (הלכות סנהדרין פרק יח הלכה ו) which expressly says that a זכר חייב מיתה גם בדיני הגוים. Also the שולחן ערוך (אבן העזר סימן כד) states: אסור למשכב זכור הוא מכלל עריות, והעובר על זה חייב סקילה.

Marriage & Sexuality